A quick flashback to December 6th, 2005. This entry was taken from a gig diary I had before I started the Blog. CONTEXT: At the time, I played three times a week @ a theatre called: La Maison Hantée. Peter Snow, a magician from La Maison Hantée was co-booking the talent for the United Nations Climate Change Conference (UNFCCC)/Gala Evening that would be hosted in Montreal's Biodôme (www2.ville.montreal.qc.ca). The first Meeting of the Parties to the Kyoto Protocol (MOP1) was held in Montreal from 28 November to 9 December 2005, along with the 11th conference of the Parties to the UNFCCC (COP11).
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Conférence des nations Unies sur les changements climatiques
United Nations climate Change Conference
Soirée Culturelle du Canada
Canadian cultural Evening
Au/At the Biodôme (December 6th, 2005)
J-F Ouellete (washtub bass), Stéphane Boucher (trumpet and ukelayle) and I (violin) played at the Biodôme this evening.
About a week ago, we went to the Radio Canada (CBC) headquarters on René Lesveque and were fitted with these ugly lime green men’s suites. Each suite was labeled with a piece of laminate paper giving details about the costume (what T.V. show it was from, the date of the production, the name of actor etc.) All I can remember is 1981, and Roy Dupuis' name (
Shake Hands with the Devil-2007, The Rocket-Maurice Richard 2005, etc. ) written on J-F’s suite tag. The lime green suit jackets were accompanied by tacky shirts to go underneath. After a half hour of searching for the most embarrassing combination, our costumist found us men’s blouses with rococo lace and frills around the buttons. I got the fluorescent pink one, J-F the baby yellow and Stephane: amber. We each got silk bow ties to match our silk kerchiefs of which I can only remember mine being sky blue. I was the only lucky one to be given purple suede platform shoes to match the tiny purple lines in my plaid lime green pants (this was mostly due to the fact that the pants were too long for me, so platform shoes were a quick solution.) Oh yeah…we were off to a good start!
Upon our arrival at the Biodôme, we were greeted by the salty smell of a pond being drained out to be cleaned. Passes were given to us after we presented ID, in which I had to wait an extra ten minutes because the girl could not find my name on the list. There were a few rules laid out for us: 1. We were told not to play in the Biodôme’s ecosystems. 2. The animals were not to be disturbed 3. We were not to speak to the delegates and heads of state unless spoken to first. After wandering through the halls unsure of where we would settle down and play…we decided to do our make-up & hair, while waiting for the place to fill up before getting started. The last touch to the outfit was the green clay (Argile) put on our faces and in our hair. I put my hair in two French braids and had no difficulties making the ends stick straight outta my head with the clay: I had a wire placed through my braided pig tails so that I had a Pippi Longstocking look. I got a little on the suit and prayed that CBC wouldn’t come after me.
We found a secluded corner and started playing. It felt so cold…we felt so out of place…so after barely 10 minutes of playing, we stopped and decided to find a better place to play. We strolled around and noticed kiosks devoted to food and alcohol. Waiters started offering us sushis, as well as Québec wine. After 5 servings of sushi, and one or two glasses of wine, we felt properly warmed up and started playing. We wandered around as we played our music; gathering from the looks on delegates faces we must have seemed funny. I had already decided that I felt like a glorified clown with a red violin glued to my argile covered neck, so I went with it. Amoungst us Artists was a Hugger Busker, some Faux waiters and waitresses, the two Cirque du Soleil lizard girl acrobats slinking around on the glass ceiling of the Biodome, the Montreal Gospel Choir, and many more.
We eventually found a prime performance spot; in the front couloire where 80% of the delegates where schmoozing. As we played, the waiters (during such events like this one, considered equals in the brotherhood of servers vs musicians) brought us drinks and food…interrupting our playing with hedonistic gifts for the mouth, spirit and soul. Security came up to us and told us there had be complaints regarding performers consuming food and wine. We were warned for the first time. J-F & Stéphane stuck to their guns; they used their boyish charms and flirted with the waitresses. They got the waitresses on our side and soon after the girls brought food and drinks to us secretly. I drank and ate too much. We looped the repertoire and improvised in between, shouting out sporatic vowels and grunts. It felt as if our playing was permanently out of tune, but the rhythm J-F held on the washtub bass kept the crowd going. Some shouted out “Tom Waits”, and others stared, curious. We continued playing and met some of the most beautiful people:
1. A man from South Carolina enjoyed our tunes. He often stood a few feet away and watched us…grabbing wine from the waiters and offering it to us. We shook our heads "no", but still grabbed the drinks.
2. A woman from South Asia came up to us with tears. I assumed they were tears of joy, for she had a pleasant smile on her face. As we played through her emotions she went up to Stephane, J-F and I, and barely grazing the surface of our cheeks, gave us a kiss so soft yet powerful in its teared understatement. She took the time to give each of us one. Light & fragile, it was a kiss of bliss that sent shivers down my spine...
3. Delegates from all over the world wanted to get their pictures taken with us. We had many people insist on taking pictures of themselves with us, and videotape of our performance. A group from Botswana…some Quebecois women, even a group from Japan…
4. At one point during the evening, I found myself standing still; a glass of wine in my right hand and the violin on the left, staring at two penguins who were staring right back at me. Glass separating them from I, we were only a meter away from each other. Some US politician was standing next to me staring at them as well. I looked over at him, we made eye contact...he seemed startled to be staring at me…then back to penguins…back to me...back to them...it must have been so surreal for him.
As the night went on, we ran into the South Carolina man very often. Throughout the Biodome, I would see him and he’d cheer us on while we played...at some point we had a couple of seconds to chat. Immediately, we were warned a second time; not to be too friendly with the delegates – or to drink & eat their food. Still playing a set that now stretched out to be about 3 1/2 hours long, the last I saw of him was at the end of the evening when I finally put my instrument down. As he slurped away at a fresh water oyster next to a food kiosk, he asked me what my favorite food was. I didn’t know where to start (after all, there are so many yummy foods worth eating! i thought to myself), so he offered me a fresh water oyster while asking me if I had ever tried them before. “No” I answered, and as I tried my first oyster he commented on how erotic it was. Hmmm....me in a clown costume with Argile all over my face and hair, and a South Carolina delegate in an expensive suite in the middle of the Biodome eating oysters with tabasco sauce...I sure hope he got the "Canadian Cultural Evening" he was looking for. We ate a couple more oysters not saying much, looking at each other. Then J-F & Stéphane called me over to pack our stuff. 5 hours had gone by since the beginning of the evening (of which we played one long set of 3 1/2 hours) and it was time to leave. Before leaving the Biodôme, I went to the washroom and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. The green argile had worn off around my temples and neck from sweating, and my mouth showed traces of wine drinking; a red ring with green argile cracks. I was embarrassed at the sight of me! What a horrendous looking violin clown I was.
As for the results of this Conference? According to some articles, it was a great success in that the event marked the entry into force of the Kyoto Protocol. The UNFCCC hosted more than 10,000 delegates, it was one of Canada's largest international events ever and was the largest gathering in Montreal since Expo 67. Back then Stéphane Dion was the Environment Minister and according to Wikipedia: The Montreal Action Plan is an agreement hammered out at the end of the conference to "extend the life of the Kyoto Protocol beyond its 2012 expiration date and negotiate deeper cuts in greenhouse-gas emissions." (CBC's The National).
